Rupture & Repair - You Need to Understand this to Break Toxic Patterns After A Traumatic Childhood

Rupture and Repair is a concept I first discovered from Dr. Allan Schore's work a few years ago. 

It is a framework for understanding resiliency (the ability to come back from difficult situations personally and in relationships with others) and how empathy acts as a foundational component of life and health. 

When we understand the concept of rupture and repair - we start to understand trauma and it's deeper impact on life and work. All relationships will have ruptures.  The ruptures themselves are not even what causes trauma... it is a rupture without repair which causes trauma. 

In dysfunctional families - most or all (depending on the distance of the caregivers) ruptures go un-repaired. This impacts the brain functioning, physical and biological health, and emotional health of the child and causes the child to live in a state of "FRAGMENTATION" - a fancy way of saying that children who live in unsafe childhood homes essentially live separated from themselves and their deeper emotions and feelings. They live cut off from their own self in order to survive in an immature and unhealthy family system. 

If you grew up in a harmful, unhealthy, or an emotionally void family AND you happened to be driven toward success in any area (high-achievers/performers etc). 

You've probably found that you've lived your adult life in a state of rupture - BUT you've found a way to push past that rupture and achieve many things. However - you may notice that you feel disconnected - depressed - exhausted - anxious - rageful - desperate - or any myriad of emotions on a regular basis. 

It's like living life on the surface and running from the deep-end within yourself. Endlessly treading water. 

In order to stop living this way and get to the next level in any area (relationships, career, business, artistry) you must commit to repairing the ruptures in your life rather than ignoring them. 

This is a challenging process - but it really encompasses becoming self-actualized, open, and adopting a lifestyle of healing rather than pushing. I believe it is also a process of spiritual awakening (it has been for me).  It's a process of connecting the mind to the heart. A process of willingness to embrace who you TRULY are rather than who you've been forced to be.

Its a process of seeing and exploring one's own emotional and physical body and getting to know one's own self. 

If you've been trying to break through - trying to use law of attraction or other spiritual practices - or simply find yourself constantly self-sabotaging and holding what you want away from yourself - it's a sign of some deeper ruptures within your system.

These ruptures CAN be repaired - in fact - I believe the universe is constantly leading us to repair them. And, as we do so, we do not become perfect, but rather we become EMBODIED... more empathetic to ourselves and to others. More able to move toward our goals from an empowered state of flow instead of a pushing/forceful energy. 

Enjoy this video on Rupture and Repair...

Continue Forward in Healing, 
Shyla

PS...My new 1-1 program is here. Healing and Regeneration. 3 months - you and me... you will unravel the layers of conditioning and fear, you will learn self-trust, you will remember your body and all its wisdom, and you will step into what is possible for you. This is a catalyst - a place to come undone and allow the truth of who you are to set you free.

I’m calling on three women who are absolutely ready - fear and all - to dive into a whole new way of living.
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