I cried while I was running today. When I first started seriously working out (swimming twice per day), I was on the cusp of some major breakthroughs in my life and I swam twice a day to cope with what I was losing (a codependent relationship, some unhealthy friendships, my own irresponsibility tendencies and emotional leeching). I didn’t know it then, but I was running from myself. It happened to be a rather healthy way to “escape” - or at least it seemed to be for me at the time. This was before I knew what I know now about nervous system healing, emotional scaffolding, titration, and the physiological survival response of trauma. I was doing what I could with what I had. I was trying to hold onto my core - or find my core self. Find my independence after being enmeshed with unhealthy parents and carrying that forward into my life as an adult with friendship and intimate relationship dynamics that mirrored the trauma bonds of my upbringing.

What I started...

Pursuit… in and of itself - that is the magic. That is the divinity. That is the WHOLE point.
Not the pursuit of dreams from false-self. Not the pursuit in favour of validation or what we think we need to pursue to be worthy of existing.
But the pursuit of your divine vision - your inner calling and resonance, whatever that is for you.

THAT pursuit - is gold. And the pursuit itself will even HEAL you. At the deepest level. The healing and unfolding always happens in motion. The nature of life is change. The nature of life is movement and so is the nature of healing.

THAT pursuit will humble and electrify, and sculpt and mold and absolutely show you your own self more than anything else.

And by the time you have what you have pursued - you will continue the path ANYWAY. Because it was never about what you “wanted” it was never about the “goal” It was the doing itself - the reckoning of that. The making and the creating and the persisting and resisting and...

Does acknowledging trauma mean that we are playing a victim? 
Is saying that you were traumatized as a child being TOO dramatic? 
How can we take personal responsibility for our healing if we are wallowing in victimhood? 

In this episode I'm helping you understand that trauma is NOT a dirty word. Everyone experiences trauma in life in some way. I'm helping you understand that acknowledging that you were traumatized does NOT mean you are wallowing. In fact, if we don't acknowledge our trauma, it controls us and makes our lives worse. To move forward, we've got to acknowledge the reality of what happened.

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 
Email Me: [email protected]

In this episode, we're talking about codependency, its connection to childhood trauma, nervous system states, and attachment wounding and I'm giving you some tips to heal from the desperation and loneliness of codependency

Work With Me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme
Email Me: [email protected]

In this episode, I'm talking about toxic shame. What it is, where it comes from, its connection to codependency & poor boundaries, and how to start shining a light on the darkness of shame in your life. 

Get the accompanying worksheet in the free facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/525326287969708

Email me: [email protected]

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme

"Magic is done from the heart, not the mind..."

A quote from A Discovery of Witches lol. A show my husband and I have been devouring over the past weekend. 

But isn't it true? 

I'm not against the mind. After all I believe our thoughts create our results. 
But I believe the mind must be "COHERENT" - basically fully connected - to the heart. And this is the piece of trauma healing that many miss - or inherently fear. 

That everything you FEEL - deep within the regions of the body and self. Everything you ARE is where your magic comes from. Even the "magic" of healing from years of childhood trauma or family dysfunction. 

All the keys you have are within you already. Within your beating heart. And all that we do is about coming back to that - isn't it? 

The magic of you? Is in your heart. 

Your hearts work, your heart's guidance, your heart's truth. 

And all of this is about trust. About knowing that no amount of "thinking" all by itself will get you...

You are not your work. But your work is an extension of you. It is your creation. An outflow of you. It’s what you have produced using a mix of your experience, energy, emotion, intention, sweat.  The trauma we experience as kids has an effect on our work. On our performance - on our contribution. Many (not all) who are entrepreneurial, high-performing, high-achieving, athletes have used trauma as a driving force for success - for their personal success - and in many cases they have a drive for creating change in the world in some way. 

Artists who make art about important issues that are hard to talk about.

Therapists and coaches who developed their expertise through healing their own pain (myself included).

Entrepreneurs who make a commitment to themselves to drive the world forward in some way - to build something great and leave the world better. 

Children who honour their vow to themselves to be better parents than their own and stop the cycle of...

In this video, I'm talking about a concept called "Functional Healing".

Functional Healing is my belief that life doesn't have to stop in order for you to heal and make powerful change. You can build healing into your lifestyle and see improvements in emotional regulation, performance, and behaviour as you go. 

Show Transcript Below

Time and Trauma - Episode 17

The Future

Hello my people! Hope everyone has had a wonderful week since we chatted last week.  it’s good to be with you here again - it’s always good to be with you here through the podcast. It’s an honour to be filling your ears with this knowledge and gifting it to you and knowing that you’re receiving it and doing this work and being helped and encouraged on your journey - it’s really a blessing. I love the internet! 

This week is the last installment of the time and trauma series - The past the present and the future and we are talking today about the future. The fabulous beautiful amazing future that you can actually create for yourself today - here in the present. 

Last week we talked about the present - where our power is, and the week before that we talked about the past - and how the past is over.

So moving right along -I’ve really loved teaching this...

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

This episode is packed with substance. I'm talking to you about what it really takes to create new things. And it's not what you think. 

Join me as I break down what needs to really happen in order for us to create the results we want in our lives. 

For coaching consultations email me at [email protected]


Show Transcript Below:

Episode 14 – Creating New Things

Happy New Year!!! Happy 2020. I hope you had an amazing New Years Eve – I’m recording this a few days before New Years Eve but my husband and I just have some pretty low key plans to join some friends at a restaurant here in Canada called Lonestar and then we will have them over at our place to enjoy some New Year Celebrations and we will probably do some karaoke since that has been our favourite thing to do with these particular friends of ours. So I’m very much looking forward to that. And I trust you had a beautiful New Years Eve.

So We are talking today about creating...