Podcast Episode - 42 Trauma Is Not A Dirty Word

 

Does acknowledging trauma mean that we are playing a victim? 
Is saying that you were traumatized as a child being TOO dramatic? 
How can we take personal responsibility for our healing if we are wallowing in victimhood? 

In this episode I'm helping you understand that trauma is NOT a dirty word. Everyone experiences trauma in life in some way. I'm helping you understand that acknowledging that you were traumatized does NOT mean you are wallowing. In fact, if we don't acknowledge our trauma, it controls us and makes our lives worse. To move forward, we've got to acknowledge the reality of what happened.

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 
Email Me: [email protected]

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[PODCAST EPISODE 37] Despair, Depression & Heaviness - Moving Through

This week's episode is about the deeper layers hidden in our brain imprinting, physiology, and emotional body. Join me as I discuss the impact of repressed despair, how it begins and how to move through it and release it. 

Email me: [email protected]
Work With Me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 

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[PODCAST EPISODE 36] Intergeneration Trauma and Oppressive Systems - Part 2 - Societal Systems

 

This is the second part in a two part series on intergenerational trauma in response to the current events of 2020 and namely the murder of George Floyd and the world's response to that event. 

I want to give my perspective from the lens of trauma and intergenerational trauma. 

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme
Email me: [email protected] 

 

 

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[PODCAST EPISODE 35] INTERGENERATIONAL TRAUMA AND FAMILY SYSTEMS PART 1; THE FAMILY AND THE SELF



This is the first of a two part series on intergenerational trauma. This is a topic that is extremely important right now - although it has always been. 

In light of current events (George Floyd's murder) I want to take a couple episodes to explain how oppressive systems work. How they are held up by unacknowledged trauma. And how the family and self systems mirror societal systems. 

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme
Email me: [email protected]

ROUGH SHOW NOTES BELOW: 

ntergenerational Trauma and Oppressive Systems Part #1 - The Family & The Self

Wooph - hello people - hello hello hello  - there’s a lot going on in the world right now.
Specifically - George Floyd’s murder by police officers in Minneapolis.
And there are so many emotions. And there is so much chaos. And so I wanted to do my part to help the world. And help you guys understand what’s happening in the world on a much deeper level and through a slightly...

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I Choose to Honour Myself

I choose to honour myself

Today I did some serious journaling - reflecting. I’ve felt blocked in some areas of my mind and heart and I knew the answer was to go within.
So within I went.

I recognized some areas that I was abandoning myself still. Quitting on myself ever so subtly.

I got honest. I cried. I wrote.

I wrote about how quitting on myself when I was so close to the result was a way for me to re-enact my mothers’ abandonment and neglect.

Her broken promises.

Like a reflection in the rear-view of being 10 again and waiting for two hours for my mom to pick me up outside the school, alone. 

I remember the way the trees looked - like a dream. The emptiness I felt. I remember her finally showing up … no call to the school to let them know she’d be late - no idea when she’d show up… finally she’d come and I’d ask why… reaching again - for some acknowledgement… and she’d make some flippant, dismissive comment...

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Perfectionism, Healing and the Purity of our WORK

Unhealthy Perfectionism can be a form of self-abandonment and self-neglect.

When we get lost in the work as a way to numb ourselves, distract ourselves, or avoid emotional/relational areas of our lives that need tending to - we are being seduced by unhealthy perfectionism. 

As high-performers, we can find comfort in knowing we are productive, successful and amazing at the work we do. But when it becomes a way to escape our own emotional world, perfectionism can be a sign of deep shame. When it begins to affect our performance because we are in internal agony over the quality of the work - whether it is good enough, and when we feel the work is a reflection of who we are at our core (therefore if it is good we are good, and if it is bad we are bad) this is when we begin playing with fire. 

I’m not here to hate on perfectionism - I think it can be good/healthy in certain areas. You know, we want a surgeon to be perfectionist, we want artists to some degree to be...

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[PODCAST] Episode 31 - Toxic Shame - Shining a Light in the Darkness

In this episode, I'm talking about toxic shame. What it is, where it comes from, its connection to codependency & poor boundaries, and how to start shining a light on the darkness of shame in your life. 

Get the accompanying worksheet in the free facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/525326287969708

Email me: [email protected]

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme

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Rupture & Repair - You Need to Understand this to Break Toxic Patterns After A Traumatic Childhood


Rupture and Repair is a concept I first discovered from Dr. Allan Schore's work a few years ago. 

It is a framework for understanding resiliency (the ability to come back from difficult situations personally and in relationships with others) and how empathy acts as a foundational component of life and health. 

When we understand the concept of rupture and repair - we start to understand trauma and it's deeper impact on life and work. All relationships will have ruptures.  The ruptures themselves are not even what causes trauma... it is a rupture without repair which causes trauma. 

In dysfunctional families - most or all (depending on the distance of the caregivers) ruptures go un-repaired. This impacts the brain functioning, physical and biological health, and emotional health of the child and causes the child to live in a state of "FRAGMENTATION" - a fancy way of saying that children who live in unsafe childhood homes essentially live separated from themselves and...

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What I'm Worried About...

Wanna know what I'm worried about?
Well for one... I'm nervous to write this email to you and press send. But at the same time... I want you to know me, so here goes...
I’m scared that my message, my experience, my story is just too much. I’m scared my real shit... like the REAL how-to of transformation that I took... the path I ACTUALLY followed and still follow now ... is way too R-rated, spiritual and just “out-there” for you to understand.
I’m scared to expose the truth of ME like that. It's like standing naked in the street.
The truth of what I ACTUALLY believe. I catch myself censoring myself... being scared and worried about what you'll think of me. Scared you'll think I'm too harsh and crazy and intense...
Like sure - my private clients know... I’m cool to share that in that intimate setting because I know it's what works and I know it will get them results so I can't NOT share all that soul-truth with them...
But when I’m out here...
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Magic is done from the heart, not the mind...

"Magic is done from the heart, not the mind..."

A quote from A Discovery of Witches lol. A show my husband and I have been devouring over the past weekend. 

But isn't it true? 


I'm not against the mind. After all I believe our thoughts create our results. 
But I believe the mind must be "COHERENT" - basically fully connected - to the heart. And this is the piece of trauma healing that many miss - or inherently fear. 

That everything you FEEL - deep within the regions of the body and self. Everything you ARE is where your magic comes from. Even the "magic" of healing from years of childhood trauma or family dysfunction. 

All the keys you have are within you already. Within your beating heart. And all that we do is about coming back to that - isn't it? 

The magic of you? Is in your heart. 

Your hearts work, your heart's guidance, your heart's truth. 

And all of this is about trust. About knowing that no amount of "thinking" all by itself will get you...

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