[PODCAST EPISODE 63] - Toxic Shame & Fear of Success

It's been a little over a month since I've recorded an episode and I am so happy to be back (and back with a BANG!). In this episode we're talking about toxic shame and how it relates to the fear of success in high-performers. 

Here's What's Covered:
What is Toxic Shame
Where Does it Come From
How Does Toxic Shame Show Up
My Personal Experience With Toxic Shame
Toxic Shame & Fear of Success
Toxic Shame and Internalized Rage
How to Start Healing Toxic Shame

And, at the end I share a simple prayer for support in moving through it. 

Enjoy! 

Email me: [email protected]
To Work With Me, Book Your 1-1 Consultation Here: https://calendly.com/growhealchange1 

Show Notes Below.

 

Toxic Shame & Fear of Success

Intro 

This is a deep, and sort of heavy topic. But it’s very important and it’s not really understood enough in entrepreneurial spaces and leadership and mindset  spaces. We talk about shame, but we don’t really...

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4 Areas to Focus on to Create a Life of Healing, Success & Alignment - Part 2

4 Areas to Focus on for a Life of Healing, Success & Alignment - Part 2 - Your True Work

Yesterday was about the first area of focus -  Trauma Healing (read yesterday's blog here).  Now that we’ve covered the importance of making sure your roots are in a state of repair, we’re moving on to the second area - Your True Work. 

 

What’s beautiful about the process of trauma healing is that it creates safety and resilience inside of you. That means you have a felt-sense of your own ability to be safe and secure within your own body.  This balances your mental, spiritual, emotional and nervous system(s). Once that happens, you begin to unlock your own gifts and talents. When your base level state is a state of health and repair, you naturally discover your own success codes.  

Everything that you have been through and healed from  is part of you. It is inside of you and part of your story. Your brain and body, your cells and...

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4 Areas to Focus on to Create a Life of Healing, Success & Alignment

 Four Areas to Focus on to Create a Life of Healing, Success, and Alignment. 

  1. Trauma Healing, & Embodiment
    2.Your True Work (purpose-work and contribution),
    3. Spirituality, And
    4. Abundance (expanding capacity for wealth) 

Today, we'll discuss the first of these four areas: Trauma-Healing. 

 

 

Trauma Healing

This is one area that most ambitious, high-performing people tend to avoid. But the truth is that all humans have experienced trauma to varying degrees at one point or another. Trauma is simply too much, too soon, too fast, for our processing abilities at the time (mental, spiritual, emotional, physical). And, all humans have the ability to heal.

 

Trauma healing is first about restoring and creating a sense of stability, safety and security inside of ourselves. If you’re familiar with the chakra systems (energy centres) , the root chakra is the place where our physical body makes contact with life itself. I think this is helpful...

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[GHC Episode 58 - Axis of Healing Pt 3. Emotional System(s)]

This week's episode is all about the Emotional System(s). I talk about how emotional literacy, emotional intelligence, and emotional maturity are gateways to cultivating the divine feminine.
I also give 9 tips to help you heal your emotional system(s). 

Work With Me: www.shylacash.com/workwithme

Email Me: grow@growhealchange

Show Notes: https://www.shylacash.com/blog/ghc-episode-58-axis-of-healing-pt-3-emotional-system-s 

Show Notes: 

Emotional system is a messenger system

Drinking some Canadian Tim Hortons steeped tea and ate some pizza - watched mommy tang and the simply podlogical podcast. Had 5 coaching calls. And now i’m recording this podcast. 

 

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Announcement - Healing Masterclass Series - #3 - Grounded spirituality how to use spiritual tools to move your life forward without taking on a specific religious or spiritual modality. 

And this is sooo so important: 

 

This masterclass is...

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[GHC Podcast - Episode 56] - Axis of Success & Healing Part 1- Bringing it All Together

 

My work is about bringing it all together. 
Deep Healing & Aligned Success are not one dimensional. 
You are a system within systems as powerful human being. 

Creating true freedom depends on looking at this Axis of Healing and Success. 

Join me as I break down this enlightening concept to show you many facets of healing and success, so you can bring your whole self to the table.

To work with me, Email Me: [email protected] or message me on instagram @growhealchange

 

 

 

 

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Healing & Success Axis

My work is about bringing it all together. 

Deep Healing & Aligned Success are not one dimensional. 

You are a system within systems as powerful human being. 

 

Creating true freedom depends on looking at this Axis of Healing and Success. 

And being reverent and respectful of all elements of you. 

Each element doesn’t necessarily have to have equal focus, depending on where you are in your journey you may be placing specific focus on one or two… and as we become masters of our own inner sanctum, we begin to learn how to balance them, and direct focus at the right ones for us for where we are on our timeline.  

 

This modality moves beyond black and white thinking or one-size fits all and into an integrated approach.

To me, if we are talking about success, we are talking about releasing the trauma of age-old conditioning within all of our systems. They work together. And, if we are talking about trauma healing, we must...

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2021 Reading List

Just Made My Reading List for 2021
Here's the 10 books I'm reading:
_______________________
  • The Originals - Adam Grant (this is required reading in one of the masterminds I'm in with my coach)
  • Polyvagal Theory in Therapy - Deb Dana
  • In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts - Gabor Mate
  • Scattered Minds - Gabor Mate
  • Lost Connections - Johann Hari
  • The Great Work of Your Life - Stephen Cope
  • Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers - Robert M Sapolsky
  • Tao of Fully Feeling - Pete Walker
  • Behave - Robert M Sapolsky
  • The Magician's Way - William Whitecloud
__________________________
I love to re-read and study the written word.
To me, reading is a highly spiritual experience.
My mom was highly abusive - she homeschooled me - Tiger Mother to the Extreme - however, she placed high priority on reading and writing. That, combined with growing up Hardcore Christian Fundamentalist (high focus on bible reading and study) gave me a deep reverence and respect for words.

Funny how even the most brutal...
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[GHC PODCAST - EPISODE 55] Validation Vs Indulgence

Are you scared that if you validate your emotions, or the trauma you've experienced that you'll turn into a self-pitying, self-indulgent whiner? 

It's not so! Validating our emotions helps us process and move through them. 

In this episode I explain the difference between validating our emotions and indulging them. 

Trauma Healing for High Performers Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/traumahealingforhighperformers
Email Me: [email protected]
Book a Consultation: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 


Validation Vs. Indulgence

Today we’re talking about the difference between validating ourselves and indulging ourselves.

Validation: recognition or affirmation that a person or their feelings or opinions are valid or worthwhile.


Indulgence: allow oneself to enjoy the pleasure of.


So, when it comes to validation: Often our families didn’t do this - our interactions with them caused us to discount our feelings and our opinions about...

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BONUS PODCAST - Episode 54 - The Queen's Gambit!

Queen’s Gambit is the epitome of a high-performer grappling with childhood trauma. Beth, brilliant, excels in school, and a wonderful gift/obsession of playing chess.

However, to break the chains of sabotage, and to allow herself the true win that she desires - she’s got to wade through addiction, sorrow, abandonment and loneliness. 

Join me as I share parallels between Beth Harmon's Journey and our journey as High Performers Healing from Trauma.

Email Me: [email protected]
Work With Me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 
Human Design: https://www.jovianarchive.com/get_your_chart

Bonus Podcast Episode  - Queen’s Gambit 

 

Queen’s Gambit is the epitome of a high-performer grappling with childhood trauma. Beth, brilliant, excels in school, and a wonderful gift/obsession of playing chess.

 

However, to break the chains of sabotage, and to allow herself the true win that she desires - she’s got to wade through...

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[GCH PODCAST EPISODE 53] The Healing Paradigm

We can't heal trauma from trauma responses, and so it's so important that we understand that our responses to trauma are often so ingrained and imprinted that we don't recognize them as trauma responses. We think they (our responses) are who we are. But this is a trauma paradigm. And so, to heal, we move into a whole new reality, we move into the paradigm of healing. 

Email Me: [email protected] 
Work With Me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme

SEE SHOW NOTES BELOW:



Paradigm = a typical example or pattern of something; a model.

This is really what people are talking about when they’re talking about mindset - your mindset is your paradigm, it’s the patterns that are running beneath the surface. And I also believe in heart set which is like your emotional state because they inform each other and influence each other.

It is so essential and so important that when you’re healing that you focus on your internal mindset and heartset - that you work on...

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