There's What Happened and There's Who You Are

There’s what happened… and then there’s who you ARE…

It’s hard to separate the two. What happened. The circumstance. The object. The swirling of life around you. And the past events that shaped who you are. Versus YOU - who you are, what you VALUE, yourSELF, your CORE, your POWER.

Life pushes fast fast faster against you and everything has a sense of constriction. Constraint. Pressure. Before long we’re going through motions that we never meant to go through. Living from a paradigm we did not choose.

I find nothing more terrifying than when I notice that I’ve confused what’s happening or what happened with myself - my values - and my power. I coast along complaining about how hard it all is until life and God grant me a reality check that slaps me in the face and wakes me up from the daily slumber of pity.

The deeper truth is that nothing that is happening outside of me, and even nothing that happened to me IS me. I am not my job or my business. I am not my marriage. I am not my childhood trauma. I am not my friendships.

When I’ve gotten stuck on my healing journey - or in life in general - it’s always ONE thing that trips me up. It’s when I forget my power, to decide - to respond - to choose - and to live in alignment with what I choose for my life. Of course it’s hard - but the hardship of it does not negate the truth of it.

Autopilot living is easy - but it’s also hard. It hurts. And the pain of familiarity and dullness drones on and on. Until we decide to stop it, to stop complaining about the lack of time/money/resources/people/energy and stop. When we stop looking around and start looking within, we realize that inside of us is a neglected secret garden with colours and vibrance and beauty. And an infinite well of power.

When I pry my cold dead hands off my circumstances, my past, and my excuses - a world opens to me and I gain access to an enduring truth that guides me and shows me the way and gives me the power to make decisions from that place.

So, what is that enduring truth?
I can choose, and beyond that I am responsible for the choices I make.
I decide.
I decide how I respond. I decide where I spend my time. I decide which habits and attitudes to cultivate. I decide whether to focus on healing and recovery or not. I decide whether to be an asshole or not. I decide. I decide to direct my focus and passion and skill or not. I decide to bring my dreams to life or not.

Stephen Covey wrote, in reference to enduring principles and truths, “We cannot break the law… we can only break ourselves against the law…”

We break ourselves against the truth, against reality, when we hold on to the pain of the past as a reason for our personal lacking. We see this with addiction - when we destroy ourselves in our personal addictions as a result of being destroyed by abuse and neglect as children. Or when we indulge in resentment and blame and find ourselves more and more poisoned. And we lose all power in the process - we break ourselves.

As horrible and terrible as the past may have been. Even as circumstances may be now… you still have power. To choose. To decide.

How will you respond?
What life will you create for yourself?
Will you choose to put one foot in front of the other and live by your values?
Will you heal those deep wounds - or push them down and avoid them - and blame others when they fester and poison your life?

What will you choose?

Continue Forward in Healing,
Shyla

PS... Are you coming to the FREE Healing Mindset & Mastery Class on Wednesday (August 26th at 7pm EST)?
As someone who grew up in extreme family dysfunction, and has now built a lifestyle of healing and power, I want to share with you what I know about courage, faith, and power. I’m demystifying spiritual and personal power in this class to give you tools to see this thing through. The pain of childhood trauma is SO real. I honour that. I know the ties that bind.
But growth, healing, and change is JUST as powerful. Come and join me in this free class darling to learn all about it. We’re covering what personal and spiritual power actually is - how to access it and feel it in your core.
We’re covering the roots of integrity and alignment and inner strength
We’re going through the nuts and bolts of creating a LIFESTYLE of healing and power. Not just bursts of motivation but real, lasting, deep rooted change that lasts forever.
We’re covering personal responsibility, ownership, decision-making power, agency, and FAITH.
This is an awesome live, FREE workshop I've created for you with the intention of helping you heal - for real!
Register here (it will be recorded if you can't make it live): https://www.shylacash.com/HealingMindsetMastery