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GHC PODCAST EPISODE 48 - BUILDING RESILIENCE

In today's podcast I talk about what it means to build resilience. I talk about what it means to build emotional resilience, and some common misconceptions/myths about what resilience is. 

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 
Email Me: grow@growhealchange.org



Resilience is the ability to bounce back. Move on. Get on with your life.


Resilience is an Emotional Skill that can be built. I like to think that people who have dealt with trauma actually have tremendous capacity to build resilience because of what we have been through. And we think what we have been through disqualifies us - but I really think it qualifies us for some tremendous transcendence, leadership, spiritual gifts if you’re into that kind of thing, as well as empathy, discernment etc - listen to how you think about trauma for more on that.

What Resilience Is:
Connecting to our emotions
Moving through emotions
Managing our own internal states
Recognizing when we need support and...

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Life, Healing, It's All About Opening

Life, Healing... It’s all about opening. 

Last night I had a surge of sadness move through my full body for seemingly “no reason”. I wept. This morning I had the same. I wept. Full body chest weeping and heart-opening. It is what it is. No resistance. No shame. No fear.

Gone are the days of resistance to what is.

Gone are the days of resisting the full body nervous system and spiritual release.
I wonder if we’ve become so sanitized to what we should be feeling and thinking that we’ve forgotten what we ARE actually feeling and thinking in this moment.
When you’re beginning the journey of healing, you’re beginning the journey of opening. And when you’re opening, at first, you don’t want to rip the thing open because what will explode out may explode you and cause you to hurriedly seal that thing back on shut and keep on going through the motions.

But as time goes on and as you grow, the opening process is much more fluid. The...
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What EXACTLY does it take to break through resistance and shame?

What EXACTLY does it take to break through resistance and shame?

The gap between here and there… the great divide… the dark forest… that thick foggy smog that must be traveled through to get to where you wanna go.

How exactly do you get there?
And… before you start moving - how do you deal with the blanket of resistance and shame that keeps you laying low below desire?

One. Day. At. A Time Darling.
That’s it.

You don’t swallow that beast with all its fire whole on day one. It would explode you. 

Instead.
You sit up, swing those legs over the bed. And do today’s work.
And today’s work is the absolute hardest to do isn’t it?

And what do I mean by work? I’m not talking about it in the traditional sense --- although maybe I am --- but what I really mean is the emotional and spiritual work. Going about the business of sorting out the chaos inside. Untangling that big heavy knot one string at a time.

Gently tugging.

...

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Let yourself FEEL the cells, the skin, the blood flowing to your heart, the breath flowing to your lungs. THIS is life darling. THIS is life. And it’s okay.

I cried while I was running today. When I first started seriously working out (swimming twice per day), I was on the cusp of some major breakthroughs in my life and I swam twice a day to cope with what I was losing (a codependent relationship, some unhealthy friendships, my own irresponsibility tendencies and emotional leeching). I didn’t know it then, but I was running from myself. It happened to be a rather healthy way to “escape” - or at least it seemed to be for me at the time. This was before I knew what I know now about nervous system healing, emotional scaffolding, titration, and the physiological survival response of trauma. I was doing what I could with what I had. I was trying to hold onto my core - or find my core self. Find my independence after being enmeshed with unhealthy parents and carrying that forward into my life as an adult with friendship and intimate relationship dynamics that mirrored the trauma bonds of my upbringing.

What I started...

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Pursuit - in and of itself - that's the magic

Pursuit… in and of itself - that is the magic. That is the divinity. That is the WHOLE point.
Not the pursuit of dreams from false-self. Not the pursuit in favour of validation or what we think we need to pursue to be worthy of existing.
But the pursuit of your divine vision - your inner calling and resonance, whatever that is for you.

THAT pursuit - is gold. And the pursuit itself will even HEAL you. At the deepest level. The healing and unfolding always happens in motion. The nature of life is change. The nature of life is movement and so is the nature of healing.

THAT pursuit will humble and electrify, and sculpt and mold and absolutely show you your own self more than anything else.

And by the time you have what you have pursued - you will continue the path ANYWAY. Because it was never about what you “wanted” it was never about the “goal” It was the doing itself - the reckoning of that. The making and the creating and the persisting and resisting and...

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Podcast Episode - 42 Trauma Is Not A Dirty Word

 

Does acknowledging trauma mean that we are playing a victim? 
Is saying that you were traumatized as a child being TOO dramatic? 
How can we take personal responsibility for our healing if we are wallowing in victimhood? 

In this episode I'm helping you understand that trauma is NOT a dirty word. Everyone experiences trauma in life in some way. I'm helping you understand that acknowledging that you were traumatized does NOT mean you are wallowing. In fact, if we don't acknowledge our trauma, it controls us and makes our lives worse. To move forward, we've got to acknowledge the reality of what happened.

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 
Email Me: grow@growhealchange.org

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PODCAST EPISODE 41 - If I Rescue You, Will You Rescue Me? Healing the Desperation of Codependency



In this episode, we're talking about codependency, its connection to childhood trauma, nervous system states, and attachment wounding and I'm giving you some tips to heal from the desperation and loneliness of codependency

Work With Me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme
Email Me: grow@growhealchange.org

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[PODCAST] Episode 31 - Toxic Shame - Shining a Light in the Darkness

In this episode, I'm talking about toxic shame. What it is, where it comes from, its connection to codependency & poor boundaries, and how to start shining a light on the darkness of shame in your life. 

Get the accompanying worksheet in the free facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/525326287969708

Email me: grow@growhealchange.org

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme

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Magic is done from the heart, not the mind...

"Magic is done from the heart, not the mind..."

A quote from A Discovery of Witches lol. A show my husband and I have been devouring over the past weekend. 

But isn't it true? 


I'm not against the mind. After all I believe our thoughts create our results. 
But I believe the mind must be "COHERENT" - basically fully connected - to the heart. And this is the piece of trauma healing that many miss - or inherently fear. 

That everything you FEEL - deep within the regions of the body and self. Everything you ARE is where your magic comes from. Even the "magic" of healing from years of childhood trauma or family dysfunction. 

All the keys you have are within you already. Within your beating heart. And all that we do is about coming back to that - isn't it? 

The magic of you? Is in your heart. 

Your hearts work, your heart's guidance, your heart's truth. 

And all of this is about trust. About knowing that no amount of "thinking" all by itself will get you...

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Childhood Trauma, Emotional Health, High-Performance and Your Great Work

You are not your work. But your work is an extension of you. It is your creation. An outflow of you. It’s what you have produced using a mix of your experience, energy, emotion, intention, sweat.  The trauma we experience as kids has an effect on our work. On our performance - on our contribution. Many (not all) who are entrepreneurial, high-performing, high-achieving, athletes have used trauma as a driving force for success - for their personal success - and in many cases they have a drive for creating change in the world in some way. 

Artists who make art about important issues that are hard to talk about.

Therapists and coaches who developed their expertise through healing their own pain (myself included).

Entrepreneurs who make a commitment to themselves to drive the world forward in some way - to build something great and leave the world better. 

Children who honour their vow to themselves to be better parents than their own and stop the cycle of...

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