I choose to honour myself
Today I did some serious journaling - reflecting. I’ve felt blocked in some areas of my mind and heart and I knew the answer was to go within.
So within I went.
I recognized some areas that I was abandoning myself still. Quitting on myself ever so subtly.
I got honest. I cried. I wrote.
I wrote about how quitting on myself when I was so close to the result was a way for me to re-enact my mothers’ abandonment and neglect.
Her broken promises.
Like a reflection in the rear-view of being 10 again and waiting for two hours for my mom to pick me up outside the school, alone.
I remember the way the trees looked - like a dream. The emptiness I felt. I remember her finally showing up … no call to the school to let them know she’d be late - no idea when she’d show up… finally she’d come and I’d ask why… reaching again - for some acknowledgement… and she’d make some flippant, dismissive comment...
In this episode, I'm talking about toxic shame. What it is, where it comes from, its connection to codependency & poor boundaries, and how to start shining a light on the darkness of shame in your life.
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"Magic is done from the heart, not the mind..."
A quote from A Discovery of Witches lol. A show my husband and I have been devouring over the past weekend.
But isn't it true?
I'm not against the mind. After all I believe our thoughts create our results.
But I believe the mind must be "COHERENT" - basically fully connected - to the heart. And this is the piece of trauma healing that many miss - or inherently fear.
That everything you FEEL - deep within the regions of the body and self. Everything you ARE is where your magic comes from. Even the "magic" of healing from years of childhood trauma or family dysfunction.
All the keys you have are within you already. Within your beating heart. And all that we do is about coming back to that - isn't it?
The magic of you? Is in your heart.
Your hearts work, your heart's guidance, your heart's truth.
And all of this is about trust. About knowing that no amount of "thinking" all by itself will get you...
I wade in these waters and I dance
Until everything is unraveled
And all is revealed.
And I move and I cry and I scream
And I know for sure
That I am here.
I open my eyes again and again to the sun
After all those years of pain
I see again - my big huge life
That I created from the ashes.
And I teach what I have learned.
A family is more than people who live in the same house.
You can come home to your body.
You are the sun and the moon and the stars.
You mean something.
You have the birthright to exist because you are here
And that is enough.
No one speaks for you.
You speak for your own self - you have the power to do it.
You have the power.
And I go back to my own heart.
To my own well.
And I allow it to run deep and deep and deeper still
And make no apologies
For what emerges from that place.
For what decides to open up.
Instead I be there. I be there. I be there with it.
I am there.
I am here.
I am here.
Written by Yours Truly,
This Week's Podcast is my open letter to all of you who have chosen this incredible healing path.
It's written to encourage, bless, and uplift you along the way.
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Show Transcript Below:
Episode 19 - What I Know About You
Welcome to another week of the Grow Heal Change Coaching Podcast. First of all I have to thank you all for the amazing response to last week’s episode - Body or Brain which was just amazing. I feel so blessed to part of your journey - i got lots of response and messages on Instagram and i so appreciate that so thank you so much.
Here's what others are saying about it:
"The Best Podcast Ever About the Mind Body Connection"
"I listened to Body or Brain and can I just say, wow. I am so grateful to you for putting everything together so well and making sense of this crazy ride and it's something I've always struggled to do...
In this episode we're talking about trauma healing.
What's more important in the healing process? Our body, or our thoughts? Listen to this episode to learn about the body's physical responses to trauma, and the role of our thinking in the healing process.
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SHOW TRANSCRIPT BELOW
Body, Brain, or Both?
Hello and welcome welcome welcome to another week of the Grow Heal Change Coaching Podcast - happy and blessed and grateful to be here with you all again for episode number 18 of Grow Heal Change - we are KILLING it here together.
Can I ask a favour of you? If you have been listening to this podcast and following and benefitting from this work could you please so kindly leave me a review on iTunes. Those reviews will allow the podcast to be found more easily by others who are searching for this kind of work. I so...