When we find ourselves approaching healing from a deep sense of unworthiness, we can start to feel like we must know everything about healing and consume all the info we can. But this comes from a deep sense of inadequacy that is subtle but insidious.
In this episode, I'm helping you breathe a sigh of relief. You don't have to do it perfectly and you don't have to know everything to heal from trauma. You are worthy. It's not about the outside-in, but about the inside out.
Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme
Unhealthy Perfectionism can be a form of self-abandonment and self-neglect.
When we get lost in the work as a way to numb ourselves, distract ourselves, or avoid emotional/relational areas of our lives that need tending to - we are being seduced by unhealthy perfectionism.
As high-performers, we can find comfort in knowing we are productive, successful and amazing at the work we do. But when it becomes a way to escape our own emotional world, perfectionism can be a sign of deep shame. When it begins to affect our performance because we are in internal agony over the quality of the work - whether it is good enough, and when we feel the work is a reflection of who we are at our core (therefore if it is good we are good, and if it is bad we are bad) this is when we begin playing with fire.
I’m not here to hate on perfectionism - I think it can be good/healthy in certain areas. You know, we want a surgeon to be perfectionist, we want artists to some degree to be...