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[PODCAST EPISODE 32] You Can't Fix It



As adults who grew up in family dysfunction - we often find ourselves needing to fix others and ourselves. We get involved with people we believe need fixing, and we approach healing from the belief that we are faulty and need fixing. 

In this episode, I'm sharing where this compulsion comes from - how to release it, and reframe the core beliefs that cause it.

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 
Email Me: grow@growhealchange.org
Free Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/525326287969708

Show Transcript Below: 


In my clients - and even in myself - I notice this impulse - really it’s a compulsion more so. To fix things. To fix other people - to fix ourselves - to fix the past - to fix every single little mistake.

Why do we feel the impulse to fix ourselves, fix others, and fix situations that have happened in the past?

It’s important to understand that this compulsive fixing behaviour is not your fault. It’s...

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Perfectionism, Healing and the Purity of our WORK

Unhealthy Perfectionism can be a form of self-abandonment and self-neglect.

When we get lost in the work as a way to numb ourselves, distract ourselves, or avoid emotional/relational areas of our lives that need tending to - we are being seduced by unhealthy perfectionism. 

As high-performers, we can find comfort in knowing we are productive, successful and amazing at the work we do. But when it becomes a way to escape our own emotional world, perfectionism can be a sign of deep shame. When it begins to affect our performance because we are in internal agony over the quality of the work - whether it is good enough, and when we feel the work is a reflection of who we are at our core (therefore if it is good we are good, and if it is bad we are bad) this is when we begin playing with fire. 

I’m not here to hate on perfectionism - I think it can be good/healthy in certain areas. You know, we want a surgeon to be perfectionist, we want artists to some degree to be...

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BUT I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT; Do we need to talk about trauma in order to heal it?

BUT I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT; Do we need to talk about trauma in order to heal it?

This article is part of the Therapeer Event Hosted by Justin LMFT 

To view the articles of other contributors click here:  https://www.justinlmft.com/post/therapeercontentevent1 

You can listen to the audio below also.

THE NEW SCIENCE OF TRAUMA
The question of whether we need to talk about the traumatic events in our lives in order to heal them is one that is only recently emerging. In the world of therapy and life coaching, it used to be essential to “process memories”, to hash it out, to integrate our experiences by talking about them with a compassionate witness.  The cliche image comes to mind of the client on the couch with kleenex talking to a figure sitting in a chair with a notepad and glasses. 

Lately, however,  the new science of trauma is giving us a much deeper understanding of what trauma actually IS.  And with this incredible...

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Episode 17 - Time and Trauma Part 3 - The Future

Show Transcript Below

Time and Trauma - Episode 17

The Future

Hello my people! Hope everyone has had a wonderful week since we chatted last week.  it’s good to be with you here again - it’s always good to be with you here through the podcast. It’s an honour to be filling your ears with this knowledge and gifting it to you and knowing that you’re receiving it and doing this work and being helped and encouraged on your journey - it’s really a blessing. I love the internet! 

 

This week is the last installment of the time and trauma series - The past the present and the future and we are talking today about the future. The fabulous beautiful amazing future that you can actually create for yourself today - here in the present. 

 

Last week we talked about the present - where our power is, and the week before that we talked about the past - and how the past is over.

 

So moving right along -I’ve really loved teaching this...

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Episode 16 - Time & Trauma Part 2 - The Present

In part 2 of Time and Trauma - We’re talking about the present.

The present is where all our power is. And yet, we operate in the present from past paradigms and we feel disempowered.

In this episode, I’m giving you a practical tool to help you differentiate what happened in the past from what you decide to make that mean for your present and future

Email me at grow@growhealchange.org

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What is Emotional Health?

What is Emotional Health? 

In this video I'm breaking down Emotional Health. I'm talking about what it is, and three essential pillars to building it:

1. Taking Responsibility for Your Life

2. Feeling/Experiencing Your Emotions

3. Loving and Caring For Yourself

To work with me 1-1, send me an email: grow@growhealchange.org

To learn more about my monthly membership group, click here: https://www.shylacash.com/emotionalhe...

 

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Episode 15 - Time & Trauma

This week's episode is the beginning of a three part series on Time and Trauma.

This is the first instalment of the series and it's all about the past.

Listen to the episode to hear my unique perspective on healing from the past as it relates to trauma. You've never heard it taught this way before. 


Show Transcript Below:

Episode 15
Time and Trauma

Hello - welcome to episode 15 of the podcast i’m so happy to be here with you all. And so happy that you’re listening and benefiting from this work. I want to ask a favour of you - if you like this podcast and you’re enjoying my work - it would mean the world to me if you could leave me a review on iTunes. You can do it right from your phone and it will help other people find this work and allow the reach of this show to reach others who need some help and support. I would greatly appreciate that so thank you so much.

So - today is going to be the first in a series of 3 episodes that I am doing about time and...

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Episode 14 - Creating New Things

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

This episode is packed with substance. I'm talking to you about what it really takes to create new things. And it's not what you think. 

Join me as I break down what needs to really happen in order for us to create the results we want in our lives. 

For coaching consultations email me at grow@growhealchange.org


Show Transcript Below:

Episode 14 – Creating New Things

Happy New Year!!! Happy 2020. I hope you had an amazing New Years Eve – I’m recording this a few days before New Years Eve but my husband and I just have some pretty low key plans to join some friends at a restaurant here in Canada called Lonestar and then we will have them over at our place to enjoy some New Year Celebrations and we will probably do some karaoke since that has been our favourite thing to do with these particular friends of ours. So I’m very much looking forward to that. And I trust you had a beautiful New Years Eve.

So We are talking today about creating...

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Episode 13 - Why I don't believe in "SURVIVING" the Holidays


Show Transcript Below:

Why I don’t believe in surviving Podcast Episode 13

HELLO HELLO!
It is the holiday season and after a couple weeks away from the podcast, I am excited and fired up about today’s episode. It’s going to come out on Christmas day and it’s perfect because I know that Christmas and the New Year are times of deep emotion and deep reflection.

AND I know that a lot of you really struggle with some sadness and some heaviness and some emotional stuff during the holiday season. And this podcast episode is designed to help you with that and to enlighten you and heighten your awareness about how you view your journey in this life and in this world.

So - I want to talk about why I don’t believe in the concept or the idea, or the mindset of surviving the holiday season. I’m seeing a lot of stuff pop up online about the holiday survival guide,  And why I think this mindset keeps people stuck in emotional pain, keeps people from feeling...

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