I was about 6 years into my healing journey when I discovered the role the nervous system plays in healing from trauma and chronic stress. By healing journey, I mean healing from a childhood of abuse and neglect. Side effects of being raised by a mom whose unresolved childhood trauma led to paranoid schizophrenia, NPD and manic depression.
My journey started with therapy. At around 18, I found myself in the office of an angel who helped me understand that my home was not normal. That it was, in fact, abusive. She gave me a check list for abuse and I checked off almost everything on it.
It was her that helped me realize I needed to move away from my parents home.
After that, things were not all well and good. I was a mess - and chose to put myself in messy relationships with messy people. I was dysfunctional inside. But I worked hard at my retail job, I participated in church leadership, and I did well in college as an honour roll student.
I had a boyfriend who was dealing with severe...
In this episode of the heal for real podcast, I am talking about trauma and choice.
I discuss what trauma is - and how my understanding of trauma allows me to have a very pragmatic and optimistic view of healing.
I also discuss the role of choice in healing and why I believe that - for entrepreneurs and high performers - understanding trauma and healing makes life and business so much better.
Embodied Healing Systems Waitlist: https://www.shylacash.com/EHS1
My work is about bringing it all together.
Deep Healing & Aligned Success are not one dimensional.
You are a system within systems as powerful human being.
Creating true freedom depends on looking at this Axis of Healing and Success.
And being reverent and respectful of all elements of you.
Each element doesn’t necessarily have to have equal focus, depending on where you are in your journey you may be placing specific focus on one or two… and as we become masters of our own inner sanctum, we begin to learn how to balance them, and direct focus at the right ones for us for where we are on our timeline.
This modality moves beyond black and white thinking or one-size fits all and into an integrated approach.
To me, if we are talking about success, we are talking about releasing the trauma of age-old conditioning within all of our systems. They work together. And, if we are talking about trauma healing, we must...
What EXACTLY does it take to break through resistance and shame?
The gap between here and there… the great divide… the dark forest… that thick foggy smog that must be traveled through to get to where you wanna go.
How exactly do you get there?
And… before you start moving - how do you deal with the blanket of resistance and shame that keeps you laying low below desire?
One. Day. At. A Time Darling.
You don’t swallow that beast with all its fire whole on day one. It would explode you.
You sit up, swing those legs over the bed. And do today’s work.
And today’s work is the absolute hardest to do isn’t it?
And what do I mean by work? I’m not talking about it in the traditional sense --- although maybe I am --- but what I really mean is the emotional and spiritual work. Going about the business of sorting out the chaos inside. Untangling that big heavy knot one string at a time.
As adults who grew up in family dysfunction - we often find ourselves needing to fix others and ourselves. We get involved with people we believe need fixing, and we approach healing from the belief that we are faulty and need fixing.
In this episode, I'm sharing where this compulsion comes from - how to release it, and reframe the core beliefs that cause it.
Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme
Email Me: [email protected]
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Show Transcript Below:
In my clients - and even in myself - I notice this impulse - really it’s a compulsion more so. To fix things. To fix other people - to fix ourselves - to fix the past - to fix every single little mistake.
Why do we feel the impulse to fix ourselves, fix others, and fix situations that have happened in the past?
It’s important to understand that this compulsive fixing behaviour is not your fault. It’s...
Unhealthy Perfectionism can be a form of self-abandonment and self-neglect.
When we get lost in the work as a way to numb ourselves, distract ourselves, or avoid emotional/relational areas of our lives that need tending to - we are being seduced by unhealthy perfectionism.
As high-performers, we can find comfort in knowing we are productive, successful and amazing at the work we do. But when it becomes a way to escape our own emotional world, perfectionism can be a sign of deep shame. When it begins to affect our performance because we are in internal agony over the quality of the work - whether it is good enough, and when we feel the work is a reflection of who we are at our core (therefore if it is good we are good, and if it is bad we are bad) this is when we begin playing with fire.
I’m not here to hate on perfectionism - I think it can be good/healthy in certain areas. You know, we want a surgeon to be perfectionist, we want artists to some degree to be...
BUT I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT; Do we need to talk about trauma in order to heal it?
This article is part of the Therapeer Event Hosted by Justin LMFT
To view the articles of other contributors click here: https://www.justinlmft.com/post/therapeercontentevent1
You can listen to the audio below also.
THE NEW SCIENCE OF TRAUMA
The question of whether we need to talk about the traumatic events in our lives in order to heal them is one that is only recently emerging. In the world of therapy and life coaching, it used to be essential to “process memories”, to hash it out, to integrate our experiences by talking about them with a compassionate witness. The cliche image comes to mind of the client on the couch with kleenex talking to a figure sitting in a chair with a notepad and glasses.
Lately, however, the new science of trauma is giving us a much deeper understanding of what trauma actually IS. And with this incredible...
Show Transcript Below
Time and Trauma - Episode 17
Hello my people! Hope everyone has had a wonderful week since we chatted last week. it’s good to be with you here again - it’s always good to be with you here through the podcast. It’s an honour to be filling your ears with this knowledge and gifting it to you and knowing that you’re receiving it and doing this work and being helped and encouraged on your journey - it’s really a blessing. I love the internet!
This week is the last installment of the time and trauma series - The past the present and the future and we are talking today about the future. The fabulous beautiful amazing future that you can actually create for yourself today - here in the present.
Last week we talked about the present - where our power is, and the week before that we talked about the past - and how the past is over.
So moving right along -I’ve really loved teaching this...
In part 2 of Time and Trauma - We’re talking about the present.
The present is where all our power is. And yet, we operate in the present from past paradigms and we feel disempowered.
In this episode, I’m giving you a practical tool to help you differentiate what happened in the past from what you decide to make that mean for your present and future
Email me at [email protected]