There was a time when I didn’t have my right mind - my sanity. As a teen you could have diagnosed me with reactive attachment disorder and severe depression and ADHD among other things.
I grew up in a very dysfunctional home. My mom suffers with paranoid schizophrenia and manic depression.
Her childhood was awful - she talks about being suicidal at 11.
She didn’t make her way to healing.
And when she had me, she struggled. And as a result she severely abused and neglected me. She also decided to homeschool me until I was 11.
Growing up in that situation took its toll on my developing brain and body. On the outside I adapted well as I was very smart and quite gifted as a kid. I learned how to perform in school and in church. I kept my home life a secret.
People who knew my mom knew something wasn’t right - but I felt a pressure to protect my parents and so I put on a happy face. As I got older I continued to perform well despite the inner turmoil.
But the body is not designed to hold and mask trauma and chronic stress the way I was. The cracks were always showing, but they kept getting bigger and bigger. The relationships in my life were so chaotic. I hadn’t yet realized that I was repeating my family dynamic.
At 19 I started experiencing symptoms of paranoid delusion. I remember sitting in my car outside of my apartment complex at the time. I was terrified to get out. I thought demons were going to come out of the dark. What was happening to me? Was I becoming my mom?
Really, what was happening was that my whole physiological system was breaking down as a result of the unresolved chronic stress I had been carrying since infancy.
When I was about 13 my mom said to me “you’re going to be just like me you f*n little devil” and something in me rose up amidst all that chaos and said to her “No I will not. I have a choice - and I will do everything in my power to be better than this”. Even then I was determined to break the cycle.
But there I was - 19, living chaotically in a codependent relationship with a drug addict, and terrified of walking the small distance from my car to my apartment.
I didn’t know about the science of traumatology yet.
I didn’t know the impact of chronic stress on brain function.
I didn’t know the ins and outs of family systems. I didn’t know about polyvagal theory and the branches of the nervous system.
But I knew I had faith and determination.
So I made a choice to turn my life in that direction.
Over the next few years I cried a lot. I prayed a lot. I fasted a lot. I chose not to watch TV, i swam twice a day at the YMCA, changed out coffee for green juice and I even went raw vegan for a while! I was trying anything.
I played the Bible on audio all day in my apartment.
I had a very powerful healing experience in prayer during that time. I believe God helped to reset my dorsal vagal system and bring me out of shut down (chronic depression).
But I didn’t know that terminology then - I just knew that I could breathe very deeply and didn’t have the same heavy blanket of fog to push through.
…things were changing inside me
I was studying psychology and learning all I could. I left the codependent relationship I was in when realized I was just as sick as he was and I needed to heal myself and stop focusing on fixing him.
The unhealthy friendships faded away and I spent lots of time alone and in therapy.
I started to find my voice in my relationship with my mom and dad.
Eventually I decided to completely end contact with my mom. I still love her but haven’t talked to her in years.
A few years went by and I was feeling better - more stable and balanced on the inside.
I was on my way by grace. But I still didn’t have the knowledge and education of the body-science that would repair my DNA, my cells and literally break the generational cycle of trauma not just spiritually but in my physiology.
Once again - I was led by grace to exactly what I needed: the powerful work of Dr. Peter Levine and his book Waking the Tiger.
My world broke open again in the BEST way!
I knew - I just KNEW when I read his work that this was that missing piece to complete the puzzle.
I also knew I had to share this with the whole world. I went to see a somatic practitioner, and experienced something I had never experienced before - another human being’s deep regulation that helped me access my own.
It was like I was HOME. I couldn’t believe it. It was my body. The answer was MY BODY!! I had done all the spiritual work and studied psychology and family dynamics and I was eating a perfect diet and was swimming twice a day - and it WAS working to an extent.
But this nervous system stuff - it was IT!
THIS was the missing piece.
It was my body, my muscles - my tissues and my cells were holding onto the stress of my childhood.
I had been living in a functional freeze. I didn’t know about neurodevelopmental pieces of attachment biology that I had been missing!
I dove into the body-science like food. Up all hours of the night studying and highlighting and memorizing the work and theories of the pioneers like Dr. Bruce Perry, Dr. Peter Levine, Dr Robert Scaer, Dr. Allan Schore & Dr. Stephen Porges.
I practiced and applied their work to my own body.
I had the power to reset my internal foundations deep within my body.
Everything changed from there.
My formal training includes Somatic Experiencing and Biology of Trauma to name a couple. But it is my personal healing journey that has been the foundation for the work I do in the world.
Because of my experience - I know it is possible to heal so deeply that you do not recognize yourself! To go beyond healing - to regeneration.
I know that it is possible to reset generational trauma at the deepest imaginable levels.
And it’s the combination of deep spiritual work and in depth body-science that changes EVERYTHING.
My personal journey was spiritual, physical, emotional and mental. And without all of these components together my life would be very very different.
That is what I bring you inside EHS.
I have turned my 13 years of healing, study and formal training into a curriculum, principles and framework that you can apply to your life and coaching practice that will not only transform your professional career as a coach - but your personal life and nervous system.
Inside EHS we are going from cells, to DNA, to nervous system to spirit. It’s a 10 month journey that will take you to places you never thought you could go within yourself.
And as a result - your coaching practice will never be the same. But more important than that? Your heart will be opened wide, your life force energy will be running through you and out into the world and you will feel more expressed and connected to your TRUE voice than ever before.
We begin August 1st.
NOW IS THE TIME!
Click here to book your application call with me: www.shylacash.com/embodiedhealingsystems