Episode 19 - What I Know About You

This Week's Podcast is my open letter to all of you who have chosen this incredible healing path. 

It's written to encourage, bless, and uplift you along the way. 

Enjoy. 

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Show Transcript Below: 

Episode 19 - What I Know About You

Welcome to another week of the Grow Heal Change Coaching Podcast. First of all I have to thank you all for the amazing response to last week’s episode - Body or Brain which was just amazing. I feel so blessed to part of your journey - i got lots of response and messages on Instagram and i so appreciate that so thank you so much.

Here's what others are saying about it: 

"The Best Podcast Ever About the Mind Body Connection" 

"I listened to Body or Brain and can I just say, wow. I am so grateful to you for putting everything together so well and making sense of this crazy ride and it's something I've always struggled to do for myself. I'm just entering my 20's and only started to address my traumatic childhood and the impact it had on my behavior 6 months ago and I connected with what you described yourself to be when you began your healing journey to a T."

If you haven’t listened to that episode please do. It will really clarify and help you clarify a lot of what’s going on with your mental and physical processing after trauma - or experiencing a more complex family dynamic in childhood. Or even if you’ve experienced some shock trauma or any kind of trauma really - it will help you understand what you’re experiencing beyond the surface level and a little bit deeper.

So - i want to ask all of you regular listeners out there to please do me a favour - if you have enjoyed listening to this podcast and you’ve gotten a lot out of it then I wonder if you could please leave me a review on iTunes podcasts you can do it right from your phone on the podcasts app. And It will allow other people to find this work and be encouraged and helped by it.

So today - I want to read you guys a letter - this is an open letter - to all you people out there who are in the thick of healing where ever you are on your journey and I want to encourage you and bless you and lift you up - because I know it’s not an easy journey - but I don’t want you to quit and just resign yourself because if you keep putting one foot in front of the other you will enjoy the beautiful benefit of healing and you will learn to live in a constant state of healing - and I often say you know we are healed and we are healing at the same time. And it’s a wonderful place to be. 

So please enjoy my open letter to you who have experienced childhood trauma and are choosing the healing path.

Dear Beautiful Healer 
Here’s what I know about you. 

I know you’ve been through some pretty tough stuff. I know sometimes you wake up frozen, or in a panic. And it feels like you’ve lifted 10,000 tons of emotional weight before you even leave the door to start your day. I know you feel torn, and confused. I know you feel afraid to stop and create some space in your mind and heart. I know you’re scared that if you stop to breathe - you may cry yourself to death. I know you’re afraid to feel deeply - to process your emotions. I know you’re scared they will overwhelm you and drown you like a tsunami. I know your relationships have suffered. I know you’ve stayed up in the night with tears streaming down your face because your body is experiencing waves of terror that you have no idea how to stop. I know you have an instinct, a hint, an intuition that your life was meant for something great - and I know you’re scared that you may never be able to accomplish it. I know you’re scared you’re not worthy of the life you desire. I know you’ve been told you’ll never have it. I know you’re scared to want anything because you’ve experienced so many broken promises in the past that it’s wounded your ability to experience having what you desire. 

I know you’re scared that someone will see you for who you really are and completely reject you. I know you’re scared to reveal the depths of your pain because you don’t want to scare people away and you don’t want to be viewed as weak and powerless. I know the shame makes your body collapse and sometimes you just want to hide from it all.
I know you think you have to pretend to be happy when all you want to do is cry.

I know the pain of having a parent who broke your heart over and over when all you wanted was their love.

I know you think what you experienced as a child makes you damaged goods, or unfit, or unworthy. I know you’re terrified of healing and growth but also that you want it so bad it aches.  I know you’re afraid you can’t really take care of yourself. I know you’re scared that all the work you’ve done - all the effort you’ve exerted is wasted. I know you feel like you’re running from your pain, and that you’re scared your energy to run might run out.

I know you feel like none of it should have happened.

I know you feel like there’s something wrong with you because of how it affected you. 

I know sometimes you forget you have a body - or you tune out because it all seems so overwhelming but somehow you manage to perform at a high-level and produce results in your life. 

I know how hard you’ve tried. To figure it out. To make sense of it. To fix yourself. To fill the hole.

But here is what I also know and I know it for sure. 

You are healing. Each time you experience the newness of the day, and choose to feel and sense your feet on the ground. You are healing. I know that your beautiful essence - the core of who you are - your soul was never taken from you. I know you’re tender, beautiful heart is still alive and well - and it beats in your chest and fills your body with blood. I know your lungs still breathe on their own without you telling them to. I know that you don’t have to try so hard and think so hard - I know you can surrender, you can trust, and you can let go. I know that your feelings won’t kill you - strong as they may be - I know that you can learn moment by moment - and bit by bit to feel your feelings all the way through and experience the space to see a little more clearly. I know you have what it takes to build a beautiful, big, huge life from yourself filled with abundance in relationships, in passion, in wealth, in love and in time. And I know you can have that big huge life without shame. I know your life has meaning. I know your incredible courage and undeniable strength. I know that you are learning to heal the patterns that once kept you alive - but now are of no use. I know you are slowly but surely releasing those unhealthy patterns in your body and in your mind so that you can experience more joy and peace every single day.
I know you can build up the strength to seek the support you need - and to believe you are worthy of that. I know that you are worthy of the time and money and sweat that it takes to rebuild your view of yourself and of this beautiful world. I know you have within you all the ingredients it takes to heal and build resilience. I know your future is more beautiful and more full than you can imagine. I know you are capable of so much more than you think. I know you have the ability to be an example of healing and changing generation patterns of pain and trauma and create new relationships filled with support, emotional honesty, and true connection. 

I know you have the ability to create confidence and to cultivate personal power to take on your dreams and desires with joy. I know you have gifts and talents you were born with, that can impact this world on a greater scale than you can ever imagine.  I know that you can let go of the fantasy of perfection and embrace the real, gritty beauty of a big huge life and surf that wave with joy and gratitude.

I know that no one will fix you. No one will save you. But I also know that people will help and support you to save yourself. I know that those who are meant for you will be put in your path as guides and fellow lights of healing along the way. 

I know that you are greatness itself. I know that you are life itself. And that the stories of so many generations are coursing through your veins even now. I know that you are a miracle - you are a miracle on this earth - and you are beauty and courage personified. I know without a shadow of a doubt that you have a big soul. And that it can never and will never be taken from you. I know you won’t quit on yourself. On your goals and dreams, on your desires, and on your healing. I know you will keep climbing those mountains, and wiping the sweat off your brow - and ever so often you will look down at how high you have risen and extend a hand to those who need it the most. I know you are an eagle. I know you are a lion. You are a warrior. You are a wild beast of strength and grace and primal power. You have what you need.

I see you. I see the way you fall to your knees, and I see how you are lifted up again by something you can’t explain. I see you learning. I see you growing. Even when you think you’re not. I see you making masterpieces out of the chaos in the void. I see. I see you. Our souls knew each other already. I see you.   I see your ability to heal. I see how you rise above again and again and again. I see your ability to experience the deep peace and rest that you long for. It’s all within you. I know for sure that you are whole. I know for sure that you are life. I know for sure that you are greatness. I know for sure that you are power. I know for sure you are peace. I know for sure you are grace. I know for sure that you are the sky and the stars in it. And you are the wind. And you are the water. I know for sure that you are courage. I know for sure that you are more than you could ever imagine.

And I know for sure that anything is possible for you.
So keep going. One foot in front of the other. No more trying. No more forcing. Only opening, only allowing all that is meant to be for you to be for you. And all that is meant to be released to be released. As you create time and space - from a new dimension of clarity and peace. As you allow all the despair and rage and sadness to emerge even when it feels like an earthquake. As you allow it out of your system to allow love in. You are not dying in the void. You are not alone. You are being held by arms you cannot see. By grace you cannot fathom. And you are being carried - as you surrender and open. The light slowly creeps in to break up the darkness and you are transformed day by day again and again and you are healed. And you are healing as you move forward.

And I know for sure - that anything is possible for you.