This week's episode is about the deeper layers hidden in our brain imprinting, physiology, and emotional body. Join me as I discuss the impact of repressed despair, how it begins and how to move through it and release it.
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A Major component of my recovery/healing from Complex PTSD was the experience of grief.
Grieving was an experience that I kept away from myself for many, many years. It felt safer to berate and judge and shame myself:
“I should be over this by now”
“What’s wrong with me?”
“I just need to get over it and move on”
“I don’t have time to cry about my childhood”
I didn’t know a thing about compassion.
About witnessing and holding myself.
About the sacred practice of pouring out the pain.
I didn’t know that what I truly needed was a space to grieve. I didn’t know that the grief experience which I so feared, would actually help my integrate and heal.
I had internalized the shaming messages from years of abandonment, parental betrayal, neglect, and abuse. Shaming myself kept all that pain of deep despair at bay. I preferred the more familiar pain of criticizing myself and pushing myself to keep going. I feared being...