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[PODCAST EPISODE 39] PURPOSEFUL SUFFERING & THE PORTAL OF TRAUMA



No suffering is insignificant. Suffering and trauma are part of the human experience. But, we don't have to be defined by our suffering. 

In this episode i'm talking about how it's not possible to get back to "normal" after the life-altering experience of trauma, but it is possible to transcend normal, integrate the pain, and create personal power and purpose. 

Email Me: grow@growhealchange.org
Work With Me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme

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[PODCAST EPISODE 38] A LITTLE BIT IS ENOUGH


When we find ourselves approaching healing from a deep sense of unworthiness, we can start to feel like we must know everything about healing and consume all the info we can. But this comes from a deep sense of inadequacy that is subtle but insidious. 

In this episode, I'm helping you breathe a sigh of relief. You don't have to do it perfectly and you don't have to know everything to heal from trauma. You are worthy. It's not about the outside-in, but about the inside out. 

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme
Email: grow@growhealchange.org

 

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[PODCAST EPISODE 37] Despair, Depression & Heaviness - Moving Through

This week's episode is about the deeper layers hidden in our brain imprinting, physiology, and emotional body. Join me as I discuss the impact of repressed despair, how it begins and how to move through it and release it. 

Email me: grow@growhealchange.org
Work With Me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 

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[PODCAST EPISODE 36] Intergeneration Trauma and Oppressive Systems - Part 2 - Societal Systems

 

This is the second part in a two part series on intergenerational trauma in response to the current events of 2020 and namely the murder of George Floyd and the world's response to that event. 

I want to give my perspective from the lens of trauma and intergenerational trauma. 

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme
Email me: grow@growhealchange.org 

 

 

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[PODCAST EPISODE 35] INTERGENERATIONAL TRAUMA AND FAMILY SYSTEMS PART 1; THE FAMILY AND THE SELF



This is the first of a two part series on intergenerational trauma. This is a topic that is extremely important right now - although it has always been. 

In light of current events (George Floyd's murder) I want to take a couple episodes to explain how oppressive systems work. How they are held up by unacknowledged trauma. And how the family and self systems mirror societal systems. 

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme
Email me: grow@growhealchange.org

ROUGH SHOW NOTES BELOW: 

ntergenerational Trauma and Oppressive Systems Part #1 - The Family & The Self

Wooph - hello people - hello hello hello  - there’s a lot going on in the world right now.
Specifically - George Floyd’s murder by police officers in Minneapolis.
And there are so many emotions. And there is so much chaos. And so I wanted to do my part to help the world. And help you guys understand what’s happening in the world on a much deeper level and through a slightly...

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PODCAST EPISODE 34 - GRIEVING THE FANTASY - ACCEPTING REALITY

It's so fun to indulge in fantasies - they are like warm blankets for us. Especially for those of us who used our daydreaming and fantasies to get through abusive and neglectful homes as children.

But in adulthood, over indulging in fantasies can steal our life energy and keeping us avoiding a reality that we don't like. 

In this episode I'm sharing some common fantasies of adults who grew up in dysfunctional homes and contrasting them with reality. 

I also share why it's so important to live in reality rather than in a fantasy world. 

Email me: grow@growhealchange.org

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 



SHOW NOTES BELOW

Hello hello hello and welcome to episode 34 of the grow heal change coaching podcast.

Please leave a review

Today’s topic is all about grieving fantasies and accepting realities. For those of us who grow up in abusive and neglectful childhood homes, we find ourselves living in a fantasy world. I know I was a big...

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PODCAST EPISODE 33 - THE POWER OF SLOWING DOWN



In this episode, I'm talking about the incredible power of slowing down along the healing path. I share why it's so challenging for us to slow down when we've grown up in dysfunctional families, what the signs are that we're moving too fast, and the benefits of slowing down. 

I also share one important tool that I personally use for slowing down. 

Website: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 
Email me: grow@growhealchange.org

SHOW NOTES BELOW

Introduction

Today i’m going to talk to you about a crucial crucial element to healing your life. Healing past pain and trauma -even very very deep trauma. And moving your life forward.  And that is the power of slowing down.

So many of you guys and my clients who have been on their healing journey for many many years and feel stuck and feel like they’re not making progress it’s because of this lack of ability to truly slow down and move through the process of healing your life.

High performers, high...

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I Choose to Honour Myself

I choose to honour myself

Today I did some serious journaling - reflecting. I’ve felt blocked in some areas of my mind and heart and I knew the answer was to go within.
So within I went.

I recognized some areas that I was abandoning myself still. Quitting on myself ever so subtly.

I got honest. I cried. I wrote.

I wrote about how quitting on myself when I was so close to the result was a way for me to re-enact my mothers’ abandonment and neglect.

Her broken promises.

Like a reflection in the rear-view of being 10 again and waiting for two hours for my mom to pick me up outside the school, alone. 

I remember the way the trees looked - like a dream. The emptiness I felt. I remember her finally showing up … no call to the school to let them know she’d be late - no idea when she’d show up… finally she’d come and I’d ask why… reaching again - for some acknowledgement… and she’d make some flippant, dismissive comment...

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[PODCAST EPISODE 32] You Can't Fix It



As adults who grew up in family dysfunction - we often find ourselves needing to fix others and ourselves. We get involved with people we believe need fixing, and we approach healing from the belief that we are faulty and need fixing. 

In this episode, I'm sharing where this compulsion comes from - how to release it, and reframe the core beliefs that cause it.

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 
Email Me: grow@growhealchange.org
Free Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/525326287969708

Show Transcript Below: 


In my clients - and even in myself - I notice this impulse - really it’s a compulsion more so. To fix things. To fix other people - to fix ourselves - to fix the past - to fix every single little mistake.

Why do we feel the impulse to fix ourselves, fix others, and fix situations that have happened in the past?

It’s important to understand that this compulsive fixing behaviour is not your fault. It’s...

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Perfectionism, Healing and the Purity of our WORK

Unhealthy Perfectionism can be a form of self-abandonment and self-neglect.

When we get lost in the work as a way to numb ourselves, distract ourselves, or avoid emotional/relational areas of our lives that need tending to - we are being seduced by unhealthy perfectionism. 

As high-performers, we can find comfort in knowing we are productive, successful and amazing at the work we do. But when it becomes a way to escape our own emotional world, perfectionism can be a sign of deep shame. When it begins to affect our performance because we are in internal agony over the quality of the work - whether it is good enough, and when we feel the work is a reflection of who we are at our core (therefore if it is good we are good, and if it is bad we are bad) this is when we begin playing with fire. 

I’m not here to hate on perfectionism - I think it can be good/healthy in certain areas. You know, we want a surgeon to be perfectionist, we want artists to some degree to be...

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