Why Are You Here?

I wonder why you’re here…

Here with me… letting me invade your social media feed or your email inbox with all this stuff about healing, and creating the life you desire… 
Listening to the ramblings from my heart. 

Reading… watching…

I say that I wonder - but I think I actually know.

You’re not necessarily here for me… sure you like me (at least I hope you like me since you’re reading my stuff! LOL) … but it’s not really about that is it?

What it’s really about is you. 

If you’re reading this… if you’re my client or you just enjoy my writing and my general situation…. I think you recognize that what’s coming out of me, what I'm writing about, what I’m teaching about and what I truly believe in at my core… I think you recognize yourself in there (CAUGHT YA!)

There’s something in me… that is reflecting back to you… what  is...

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Childhood Trauma & (REAL) Spiritual Power

To me, there is absolutely no recovery from childhood abuse and neglect and trauma without spiritual power. They simply co-exist together. Because everything is everything - the body, the spirit, the psyche, the emotional body… everything IS everything.

Ya.. but WHAT IS spiritual power EXACTLY?

Well… it’s the thing that carried you through the horrors you survived-  for one.
But also, it’s the thing that is ACTUALLY going to move your life forward beyond survival and into abundance, joy and most importantly receiving love.
And I’m not talking about the soggy weak spirituality of fake love and light which pretends everything is okay behind glossy dissociated eyes. 

 

I’m talking about the spiritual power that comes from integrating the WHOLE thing. From your head down to your toes, and from your toes back up to your head. Because spirituality without connection to the body is the kind of spirituality that actually perpetuates the...

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Let yourself FEEL the cells, the skin, the blood flowing to your heart, the breath flowing to your lungs. THIS is life darling. THIS is life. And it’s okay.

I cried while I was running today. When I first started seriously working out (swimming twice per day), I was on the cusp of some major breakthroughs in my life and I swam twice a day to cope with what I was losing (a codependent relationship, some unhealthy friendships, my own irresponsibility tendencies and emotional leeching). I didn’t know it then, but I was running from myself. It happened to be a rather healthy way to “escape” - or at least it seemed to be for me at the time. This was before I knew what I know now about nervous system healing, emotional scaffolding, titration, and the physiological survival response of trauma. I was doing what I could with what I had. I was trying to hold onto my core - or find my core self. Find my independence after being enmeshed with unhealthy parents and carrying that forward into my life as an adult with friendship and intimate relationship dynamics that mirrored the trauma bonds of my upbringing.

What I started...

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Pursuit - in and of itself - that's the magic

Pursuit… in and of itself - that is the magic. That is the divinity. That is the WHOLE point.
Not the pursuit of dreams from false-self. Not the pursuit in favour of validation or what we think we need to pursue to be worthy of existing.
But the pursuit of your divine vision - your inner calling and resonance, whatever that is for you.

THAT pursuit - is gold. And the pursuit itself will even HEAL you. At the deepest level. The healing and unfolding always happens in motion. The nature of life is change. The nature of life is movement and so is the nature of healing.

THAT pursuit will humble and electrify, and sculpt and mold and absolutely show you your own self more than anything else.

And by the time you have what you have pursued - you will continue the path ANYWAY. Because it was never about what you “wanted” it was never about the “goal” It was the doing itself - the reckoning of that. The making and the creating and the persisting and resisting and...

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Are you scared and intimidated around people you perceive as strong, powerful, smarter, or more accomplished than you?

Are you scared and intimidated around people you perceive as strong, powerful, smarter, or more accomplished than you?

I have felt this way sooooo many times

In fact it’s an area that I am CONSTANTLY working on within myself.

The little traumatized child in me wants to quiver and shake and fawn because that’s what I did as a little one to survive in my home around a mom who couldn’t handle the threat of someone’s light shining in her presence.

Thankfully after stumbling around in the beginning, I’ve managed to find some footing here.

What most of us do is feel weak and small and contemptuous - and then jealous - and then angry at ourselves and then feel like we shouldn’t feel that way and try and puff our chests to seem like we’re really not that vulnerable. I’ve done that a lot in my life.

And then? We think it’s so disgusting that we could allow ourselves to feel that way AGAIN after a childhood of making ourselves smaller - we...

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I ALWAYS RISE

I always rise

There’s a secret to recovery from anything really - failure, trauma, a breakup, addiction - anything.

And it’s a small little diamond in the rough of all souls that are strong enough to overcome the difficulties/pressures/tragedies of life ( which is really just overcoming our OWN shadows and self-concept and “bullshit” which of course is the result of the conditioning and layering of traumas and inherited imprints and nervous system patterns that have been handed down from the ages through the global family tree. And of course inherent in life itself is tragedy... the existential woes of the struggles we crash up against)

But back to the secret...and that is - the belief that you will always rise.

Because how are you going to get through the detox (literally or metaphorically) of your old identity? How will you have the stamina to move that life of yours forward? To recode your brain, to expand your window of tolerance and your capacity to...

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PODCAST EPISODE 43 - The Crappy Childhood Fairy


This week I'm joined by the wonderful Anna Runkle, also known as The Crappy Childhood Fairy. She, like me, grew up in a dysfunctional home and now teaches her clients how to recover. 

We discuss many common themes of trauma recovery, some personal stories, and Anna shares a little bit about her signature Daily Practice which is a tool to help regulate the brain that is being hijacked by trauma and dysregulation. 

Watch Anna on Youtube here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCCZlDCbFTqHkzV_rUP4V5bg/videos 

Check out Anna's website here: https://crappychildhoodfairy.com/

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme

Email Me: [email protected]

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Podcast Episode - 42 Trauma Is Not A Dirty Word

 

Does acknowledging trauma mean that we are playing a victim? 
Is saying that you were traumatized as a child being TOO dramatic? 
How can we take personal responsibility for our healing if we are wallowing in victimhood? 

In this episode I'm helping you understand that trauma is NOT a dirty word. Everyone experiences trauma in life in some way. I'm helping you understand that acknowledging that you were traumatized does NOT mean you are wallowing. In fact, if we don't acknowledge our trauma, it controls us and makes our lives worse. To move forward, we've got to acknowledge the reality of what happened.

Work with me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme 
Email Me: [email protected]

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PODCAST EPISODE 41 - If I Rescue You, Will You Rescue Me? Healing the Desperation of Codependency



In this episode, we're talking about codependency, its connection to childhood trauma, nervous system states, and attachment wounding and I'm giving you some tips to heal from the desperation and loneliness of codependency

Work With Me: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme
Email Me: [email protected]

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[PODCAST EPISODE 40] - When Pain is Normal



Growing up in dysfunctional families means that we become extremely familiar with pain. 

In this podcast, I'm talking about breaking free from traumatic loops when pain is all we know. I cover running from pain, self compassion and more. 

Pain does not have to be your normal. 

Email me [email protected]
Website: https://www.shylacash.com/workwithme

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